Excetera.... My ex sent me a long message tonight.it was so bizarre. He actually thought that what he was writing to me was a kindness. But what he never takes stock of, is his arrogance. I needed a few moments before I responded, as I never reply to email that is orchestrated to get an emotional response. I don't know what to make of him? His words were a thinly veiled insult and more so, a mishmash of sincerity, hubris and disdain. He as usual, did not think through that message. You write a long missive, making seem as though you care, but you really don't and yet, you write as though you do for some fucked up reason only known to you. Laughable if it were not so tragic. What a waste of time. I long for the day when he stops in his tracks and feels really stupid for the way he has acted. Gosh! If only!

WTF

Ok, so I have been a hypocrit before. But jeez, I am now officially a sexaholic. Ok, not really, but,I kinda feel like it. Frequent Flyer and I had a torrid conversation the other night. It started out so innocently too. Then all of a sudden, he's probing and I am poking his probing and blam, it's on. It didn't go that far, but the point is that it was both delicious and comfortable. The good thing here though is that I am armed with history, so I think that I can be mindful about this. I need to be vigilant though,

Stop picking

I fell out with The Towers about two months ago. Every time I think about him, part of me wants to patch up the situation. But another part does not want to. That part finds that I have tried hard enough on every type of relationship possible with the man, and we are just not compatible. I have a bad tendency to go over something in my head, as though I need some other type of closure from him. But what sort of closure could I possibly want? This last falling out had to do with him clearly trying to make some sort of demands on me. I felt quite adamant that I was not allowing anyone, any man in particular to ever try to feel that he owned me in any way! So his words just made me feel revulsion. I do not want to apologize. What I do know is that I need to continue to do my work and my projects. I spoke with my sister about doing some business together, and that excites me. The fact that my mind likes to go over beaten down paths and trod ground , I shall just have to view it the way one looks at a scar or a cut.