A new decade approaches. To look at my life in terms of ten is something I have never considered doing. However, if I give myself a moment, then it feels like a progression to mark my personal growth that way. The next decade...hmmmm...all one knows is that you know nothing (John Snow) you want to afford the future. You want to be healthy, happy and confident that life has given you more successes than losses.All of a sudden life seems so damn fast. It is as though I cannot keep up ,and I am being pushed along with the crowd. More than ever I am conscious about taking care of my thinking... I have to work on maintaining a good attitude about things. I cannot go through life using my thinking to perpetually hash up the past. I cannot live there. I am now also finding myself asking what is happiness? I don't have to be constantly entertained? Solitude is very enriching to me. After a year of uncertainty for a large part of it, and watching people plot and scheme to insinuate themselves into positions, I am entering the next decade with a shift in my focus of what matters to me and how I am going to work now. A dear friend very kindly told me that what I experienced is not as uncommon as it feels.I just felt let down and tired...overworked, underpaid and under appreciated. The situation I realized was a wake up call. I can be doing other things, and that's the direction I will be taking.

Devastated

Over the last month my family and I have been faced with coming to terms with the swift yet slow, painful death of my mothers youngest sister. One year ago she was diagnosed with Liver Cancer. From then on we all formed a group for prayer and support. My middle Aunt finally travelled to see her a few months ago. We have been communicating with them all of the time, and as they news became more and more bleak, we spoke hourly. and then half hourly and then fifteen minutes apart. We have been devastated by this death. My Aunt was never ill. She had retired from Nursing, and was one of those people who was always so conscious of her health. She ate organic stuff before it was even popular to do so. I shall be writing about what her death means to me for a long time to come. ............