It is cold, cold, cold every day. What is so funny about this being the case in this part of the world is that unlike when you are in a temperate country, you don't walk around in layers. I think I better do that in a few moments. There is so much to that I have to do. I am feeling a little overwhelmed at the moment, but I shall be fine. I feel this way only because I am thinking of many of them at once. I am very excited about the plans I have set out. After the carnival season I plan to spend some time in archives looking for the research. Then I plan a solo show and I am working on that right now. Amidst all of that I have a bunch of personal things to see to as well...I bought my daughter some rollerskates. I want to use them and I am terrified of falling on my face or my ass! But, falling is part of it isn't it?

Starting again is imperative. It is like having a second wind to do the things you set out to do but could not complete. A new year feels like that always. I put out some unfinished things today and I have materials to purchase in days ahead to make these pieces complete. It is the start of a big intention. The feeling that I get thinking and being deliberate is intoxicating. I am finally ready to step into the potential that I have waited for and honed for decades. No longer is it about what may I think is necessary to be seen and appreciated. I appreciate and that is the strength and the satisfaction of making. Why does it take so long to settle? I can only say that the fight between two minds in my thinking is the cause. There are days that I can be uninterrupted by dounbt, but that does not mean that it will not be waiting for me tomorrow. Only age brings reason. I find that I am now for want of a better way to say, better friends with myself now. As I get more centred and focused within, I see the ability to just be. It is a gift.