the vibes

Sometimes things come out of left field. A dear friend of my mothers' got in touch with me to assist her with a project. It has been an honor to help in any way that I could, because she has always been a dear person to me for most of my life. So you can imagine, I squirmed when she brought up her love life with me. I definately graduated from being a child to adult with that one talk. She usually speaks to me about my own life. She gives me advice from one divorced person to another. But this one was new to me. But as always I learn from any and everything I experience. She shows me something that I don't even think that much about, and that is getting older and having relationships. To think of myself at her age, I usually talk about never really retiring. But I do not consider anything else. But it is time to think about all of the things that I still want to do and to accomplish. Good health is key of course, and also taking care of ones mind...taking time to spend it on making myself happy......................her talking with me like that makes me want to state here some of the things that I want to write about myself. When you meet your husband at nineteen and then spend decades together, divorce sucks. However, I was on my own before I got married and even within marriage, I have not lost myself within it. But now that it is so many years later, I admit that a relationship is something that I do miss. I have also lost my best friend, so there is that too. I am much more solitary not, and I have liked that for so long, but now, I would like to talk on the phone, send texts, plan activities, go on a trip or two...have some fun and serious romance with someone I really feel comfortable, happy and loving with. Waw! I am writing that and not cringing at the admission. I miss having someone to talk to who gets what I am interested in and can discuss their point of view and we are an asset to each other. My heart actually feels warm and filled with emotion as I write that. Just a gentle, loving, sensual, rewarding relationship......hmm.