Looking back

Yesterday I was looking into old course outlines because of a past student who barely came to class now wants to again querry his grades. As I was doing so I came across a cache of images from baby pictures and visits to China. I look back at these things from time to time. Yesterday was a little different. I think that it may be because of how much longer that past now is. A lot of the photographs of things I found online and experiences I recorded, I was aware of some of the chatter of that time. I recalled vaguely the things that meant so much. Also, I see how much my taste is staying the same. There are things that I just like and I repeat my interest over and over again, even if I have never seen the images before. It also showed me repeatidly that as much as things change and so much time moves on quickly,I can also state that I have learned that it is extremely, extremely important to just do the things you long to do. Do them. As I looked at pictures particularly of dearest loved ones who have now gone, my heart ached in missing them even more than the daily memory that still stings. I felt so grateful for what at the time looked like going through the internet just looking for inspiration. I now see all of it as working on plans. I found whole projects unfinished and I enjoyed them anew. I even considered whether they should be done now? Or I enjoyed knowing that the effort was for then and then only. It was a very good experience for me to give myself the present of the past.