control is a two step dance

Use information and discipline
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1. Ask questions until you understand.

2. Start saving for the things that you want in creative ways.
You can mark on an envelope or jar the words, 'trip' or 'car'.
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NOTHING can prevent your having what you desire-others have these things.
WHY NOT YOU
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Many times you read things, and somehow, suddenly, the same old cliches suddenly jolt new thoughts or better constructions in your consciousness. What did it for me was the "Why not you." I have spent alot of time as an educator doing what I can to make students see that their only limitation is themselves. I too have these blind spots and limitations.
I sit here, in a new country, an immigrant, looking ahead at a whole future that I must create from gossimer and dreams.
It is an amazing place in which to sit.
Unaware of how anything shall play out, it may be intersting to think that this gives me no control or little control.
However this is not the case.
Starting over in one's life and career is a second chance.
I arrived at this place not completely certain of myself. I did not come with assurances. Daily I find myself aware that I have to work on myself. I can get a bit sad. I can get a bit unsure. But although I feel this way, I know that it is not forever. They are but moments.
"The Heart is the Centre" is here to help me sort myself out and to understand myself better. In a way, it is also a friend.


This morning I got up and I was very excited about how I felt about my day. You see, I am starting a web design course. It is eight weeks long and I have to go every Saturday between 2 to 6. I'll be given homework and I have to produce a project at the end of it.
At the very least, it is something Canadian to put on my resume. At the most, it is added income from future projects that will include setting up my own site. So it is a win/win situation.

This decision has me feeling really good about myself.

The next decision is to see about my driving. I don't like the bus and train taking. I find it tiresome. So when I finally finish the course, that I suspect will not be over after eight weeks. But shall go on, I think that I may want to take more than one programme. I may want to take a few more to really have a well rounded certificate. The driving would be the next thing to look at.

Making decisions like these are exciting to me. They are also a bit challenging when I think about the big picture.
What is this big picture?
As I write, the weight of the people in my life press upon me. i can hear the nay sayers and I know that that is something that I must acknowledge and look at.
As I wrote for the header, CONTROL IS A TWO STEP DANCE.
I have spent alot of my life trying to get approval, from my parents and from anyone I hold in high regard in particular. It has made me balance everything I do and say.
I am not completely closed off, but I could see how easy it would be to do so.
My being here on my own is giving me the chance to see myself in another light.
I HAVE TO CARE ABOUT WHAT I THINK for a change as the first thing and as the top priority. I have to say to myself, well what do you think you should do. Your opinion counts.
I have even managed to say to myself, look at you life as an adventure.
This helps me when I hear the naysayers in the background who expect me to fail and to need them.
LIFE IS AN ADVENTURE

LIFE is what you make it

YOU make it

MAKE IT