new realisations

Today is my birthday. I had a quiet day and lots of people wished me well, and that was nice. But one person did not do anything, and this is the second year that he has done this. It makes it quite clear that things are over. But I still feel sad about it.
When am I going to get over it, as he told me I must? Why do I still care? It has been a long time, and yet, deep inside, I have not been able to lock off my heart. Is this pathetic? Probably, because what do I wish could happen?
There is no suggestion that things will ever be the same again, although I do not want them to be the same again anyway. I would want something much, much better.
Friends say that a new relationship shall negate the old. There is some truth there I am sure. But what of the fact that new relationships are not just falling in my lap.
I am very mindful of not sounding sorry for myself here, because I don't want to feel that way, and I don't think that it is about that either.
I am also listening, to understand exactly what I think I am feeling, or wanting.
Yes, I miss someone whom I have loved for two decades. I just do, and I suppose that I must allow myself to accept that I shall feel this way until I do not feel this way. Even if I may feel this way for the rest of my life...I won't explode for it. I will feel it, and sometimes it may be a dull ache, and other times I may even smile, I gather.It is just what is.