My own wisdom

Over the last few months I have been helping two or three friends sort out emotional issues in their lives. A large part of the reason for doing so has been because they have sought me out and I recall in my life when having support was needed. For one friend in particular, I have been repeating for several months that she needs to know that she is not powerless in her situation....that she has her own life to look at, things to do for herself, and must not "give" her control of herself away to the person she is seeing as important. Now, I must use my own advice. Not that anyone is doing anything to me per say, but a silly email from my ex where he eluded to "not" being home when I replied to something he asked me about, sent my mind in a whirl....and the thing is, it is completely irrational. Why does this bother me? I answered that those simple words made me assume that he is having some great time with some woman he adores...meanwhile, I have not had any "I won't be home" messages to leave for him to make him wonder. Not that it is a tit for tat? Or is it? I feel stupid for feeling that, particularly when I had just told myself that whomesoever is meant to be in my life shall be better than anything I could expect...and leave it at that. Then my ego kicks in on auto pilot. It doesn't even try to be slick. I pounce on the meaning within his text and "my" real hopes, dreams and possible future reality is curtailed by old, outmoded thinking processes. I am no better than my friends who seek my council. I too fall into gaps where I waffle about my feelings. So I came here, to return to my own advice. What I set up for myself, the place of strength that I operate from IS ALWys better than any little weak moment of old thinking. What I choose to do is to be aware that the ego has raised it's head, observe it lightly and quickly advance my thinking toward what I do indeed want. Feel the achievement of really being in a loving place, happy with my choices, my work, myself. Feel how freeing that makes me in this actual moment. Then from that perspective, release that outmoded thought process, and actually thank it to, because to go back is to not grow into what I want to become. Why sabotage myself, and sabotage myself based on something that made me very unhappy at that. I wish him well, I care about him always and yes, I still do love him. But the point is, I love myself. I deserve to support my highest good.