stop the world for a moment

This week I promised myself that I would take a few days off from checking Facebook. But I had something to do for someone, so I had no choice but to check their message.In so doing, I came across some sad news about the death of a colleague. I had no idea that he was battling Cancer. This guy was a really lovely person. He was quite young, not yet thirty. But last year he got married, and he had had a child before getting married, and then had one after he got married. Somehow though, I never saw him as moving too fast in his life. To me he seemed to be one of the smart ones. He knew what he wanted and he was doing it with a smile every day. Tonight, I remember him with great admiration. I cannot imagine the void he has left with his wife, children and family. What I do know is that I shall never forget him. Appreciate what he came to do, however brief he was here. He made some impression on me. Grieving is a process. There is no way to get "over' it. You live with it. Some days are better than others, and eventually the person settles into the back of your mind leaving moments to remember them by. However, for now, the pain is sharpened dull at the same time. I feel so much loss this year. So much personal loss. This shall not be the last time either, as those I love are all getting on in years. It doesn't get any easier, and easy in not going to happen, ever where this is concerned. I know that with my partner, there have been days when I know that it would be so good to dial his number. We spoke every day, sometimes several times a day, coming down to the end of his life. One good thing about this passing, I have to write, is that he had fun down to the last. I am so happy to be able to write that. Nothing has upset me more with the deaths that I have experienced recently, than the fact that so many spent their last weeks and months in conflict and pain. He was in pain as well, but he had established so much love and certainty into the world he created. I could not let today pass and not remember him.