When you focus only on solving problems and your mind goes to them every single moment, it is hard to realise that there is so much beauty and joy in the world. The eye does try to remind you, as you walk with your sorrow and grief, doubt and fears. You glimpse the lush greenery and the birds as they fly by. But your stuck in your slump, so they give only tiny glimmers of hope. However, over time, it becomes like charging a battery. Somehow and somewhere the light filters out and you have moments of reprieve. This can go on and on for ages and ages. You really need more. You need books, and friends and family and support to help yourself through dark times. You also most of all need to know that dark times don't last forever and you will come out of it stronger, more resolved and yes, possibly happier. You are creating the onion skin of your life. From the last time that I wrote. I have had so many lovely things happen. I am so happy that I cannot contain how happy I feel. I want to bask in it and feel it down to my toes and I want it to stay forever. To keep referring to what makes me smile and laugh and lightens my step feels so very good. My mind wants to plan and think good thoughts and when bad ones come, I stop them and light them up with my positive sprinkling of happy glitter. I savour these moments. I guide myself to consider more that I want to do and ways to keep feeling this way. There is nothing like this feeling. I am so grateful to feel this way right now.