nearing

Last night in the midst of hanging out with two of my oldest friends, one being my former sweetheart, I felt a sudden deep pang for my marriage. This alarmed me for a moment, and then I stood still in the thought and realised that what I was possibly missing was the intimacy of a partner.

This was a good move on my part, to still myself and find what it was. It could have been very easy to assume that I was being sentimental. I admit that I have been over the years, but what keeps me focused is that I do not miss his attitude and some of his personal habits at all. (LoL)

My nieces are here from New York and the younger one has some emotional issues that the house seems loathe to handle. I just watched people fall apart and just throw up their hands at this.
I have been wondering why I am still living there? I have been so focused on getting out, and yet, nothing seems to have worked to get me, I have felt. Now, I must be careful, am I holding on using an excuse to linger? I don't think so, because I have a financial plan, and I am working towards real goals, so I would not lay such criticism at my feet.

As a spiritual thing, I can see much learning here (not trying to sound like Yoda!) But, after my last time with these children, when my sister was here, I saw today with my niece what was happening.
I shall continue to write here about my progress in all things that I do.