intrigue

I had a lengthy chat with a male friend of mine today about a number of things. We are working on a project together, so we are constantly in close proximity. We have chatted on this subject before, but this time we were able to explore the topic a lot more. Some of the things he mentioned has me curious. We both concluded that the world is such a contradictory place. But what I will also state here, is that as long as a person perceives things a certain way and only looks for the same in others, the likelihood of seeing anything else possibly is dim at best. In this instance, my friend stated that he wished that he could be rid of his sexual desires. I found this a dramatic statement and asked him why he felt that way. It seems that his experiences have not been the best. He attracts women with dependency issues. On a side note, I think I shall tell him to search himself and find out whether he attracts what he fears most or is? That way, if he works at it within himself, he may stop attracting such women. He is presently so far gone that he tells me that he is willing to pay for sex instead of having a relationship. He says that to him, most men need much more sex than they get from their partners. and...here's the shocker, he believes that women see sex as 'degrading'. Waw! That's a lot to take in. Now this is a very nice guy. He isn't even thirty seven yet, and already he is thinking this way! That blows my mind! Then, he went further to say that there is also the issue of incompatibility between men and women. He believes that many men do not even bother to try to have conversations with their girlfriends or wives about their real sexual desires for fear of insult, rejection or indifference. I have heard this from one or two other men I know...there is the whole thing about women wanting romance and men wanting sex, and I brought that up as the compromise. We both were also conscious of starting out with little suggestions and compromises leading to big compromises...would the requests never end? Suppose the desires bordered on the truly bizarre or painful, homo-erotic or truly deviant? What then? I know that this shall not be the last we shall speak of this, but I believe that his views, though relevant to him, are largely the product of both his experiences and his hard wiring by his parents and others closest to him.