poverty

Recently I was in a meeting and I was receiving messages about the thinking of the community that I am part of. We were wondering how to get what we needed for everyone to benefit, especially the people who give nothing back but complain and want the benefits. When I was asked how much money we could raise, I gave the lowest amount in my estimation. This made me realise that I was influenced by two facotors. One, my belief based on what I was being told about people and horror of horrors...my own expectations. I had to sit with that one. I don't see myself that way, but clearly I have a limited view of some things. I had to give it some thought and some more thought. I had to admit that over the years I have been worn bown by unrealised expectations. I had to acknowledge how easily I swayed toward disappointment over successes. I had become expectant that it was not worth trying because my outcome would not lead to anything much. I was appalled! Particularly when I am so sensitive to people who speak in such ways about themselves and how much i work to disavow people of any sense of self criticism. But for myself I settle into it like a warm bath. What was I going to do about this? First, become aware. Then, observe, thenpause whenever I am about to slip into the warmth of self criticism and choose to consider something better.