The Love you feel in life is a reflection of the love you feel in yourself - Deepak Chopra ...................................................................... I always seem to find the right statement when I am writing about a topic close to my emotional needs. Lol. Well Deepak Chopra stated the above and it clicked with me that I am at odds with myself, and that is why I was reflecting it back to myself with juliemangoman. He is neutral, and he showed me that when I asked him what he wants and he threw the question back to me.It is so jokey how much I can see with this experience, how much everything isn't about the subject of my interest but about how I reflect myself all of the time. If I am constantly battling how I feel about the way that I look, I am exhausted. I am way too tired to be able to put a good impression out, but more so, how can I keep attraction going? For example, as a friend told me decades ago, you don't know why someone likes you...that is about them. You respond according to what you like. So why do we always put it on the other person? So, I attracted what I want. But then, I worry about keeping it, or I worry about whether I really want it. I always find it so funny as well how I behave when I meet my crush and then how I act when I know the person awhile. I still have my core belief, but it becomes a comfortable belief. I ramp up my expectations. So, if they suddenly have a different opinion that threatens me, I either want to understand what is going on to bring the situation back to where I want it to be, or I start wondering about compatibility. In a way I move true to my zodiac sign. (ha,ha...walking sideways and retreating into my shell) Now,I see that perhaps all of that control that I hold to is all well and good, but it has its place in a relationship with myself and not so much with another person. That judgement has its downside. I can observe difference, I can mention it. I can move with it, around it, left or right off it. But to stack it up and then use it to control someone! Come on. Then, I am not in a relationship for mutual benefit. I am in it for what supports my ego, and I am not about that, and that was the issue with my friend after knowing her for twenty years. I was floored by.